A Time and A Place for the F word

A Rant on Pigs, Beaches, Fish, Stray Dogs, Chickens, Elephants and Humans

** I’m gonna be using some naughty language in this post. I’m not sorry about it either but, if you are easily offended I encourage discomfort — it helps us grow**

Five months abroad has altered my perspective. As I began witnessing/ experiencing the world from new vantage points, my reality shifted. I am seeing a lot of thoughtless “stuff” happening. Lots of people doing lots of unconscious things. And it has affected me. A lot.

The Pigs:

I don’t like seeing people killing living things. I just don’t like it. I am mind fucked by the notion that some people feel it is their RIGHT to destroy what has been created. Let’s start healing and stop killing so many damn pigs.

November 5, 2011 Journal Entry :

“I should have never gone down that road. I knew it would shake me up- but, I did. A part of me wanted to be upset. When I turned down “The Road” I initially tried to avoid it and then…I “let go” of my fear and turned around. Why? Because the ugly exists, and just because I don’t want to witness it won’t make it go away. When I approached the Slaughter house my stomach began to turn and immediately I questioned my U-Turn.

I saw them laying lifeless,with paint splattered on their backs like targets. They were just there… laying in their own shit just waiting to be dead.

I could feel the blood draining from my face. Brut force instigated the squeals of agony and instantly I recognized this animal as an equal -we all know pain. Sickness took over every cell in my body and I realized there was absolutely NOTHING i could do about this situation. Not a damn thing could be done.

The road was literally a dead end…

and the only way out was to revisit the nightmare. Upon my return… I noticed a truck. And this truck made me even more ill because it was filled with Pigs… LOTS OF PIGS ! Jammed into mini- compartments, 2 layers in fact, piled in there. In a bottom crevice I could see them squished even tighter. This space was no bigger than a small nook…any normal sized toddler would have been cramped! Liquid was running down from everywhere! And their asses… packed together ass on ass on ass—– Meat. Meat for hungry people, who have plenty of resources to choose from that don’t include killing living creatures.  I have been disturbed. And I am bothered. I was beyond myself. Crying wouldn’t have solved anything so, all I did was get fired up. I rode the shit out my bike, all the way up to the temple on the hill, fighting the urge to scream. When I got there…I realized how important it is to express so, I’m writing…

Save a Pig, Eat Tofu.


How the hell did it get this way? Where did it all get so twisted? Or were we always meant to be this way to find our way out of it? Are we so completely demented & absent minded and so totally (totally) absorbed in self- that life literally means nothing anymore? From where I’m standing- even the smallest of creatures deserves the right to exist, does it not? I feel caught in a global musical production with all cast members vying for the chance to play the “Creator who Destructs”. And this lonely chorus of bleeding hearts- rather than get fired up enough- for emotions to harness positive change- we just don’t do a damn thing. Harbored Compassion. We go on with our days- with our pleasure seeking nature- with our lives. Because, all of it- all of the twisted ways- they aren’t really directly “Our Problems”. Sometimes, it all seems too fucking Large to swallow and too fucking distant to be directly correlated to our own, personal, well-being. But, it isn’t far away from us… it is so close we could taste it, if we decided to let it have an effect. But, so often we don’t… and instead…we go numb. We numb every bit of ourselves, with ignorance or pleasure, just so we can cope.


The Elephant Torture in Thailand is no new news however, I saw first hand how it continues to be fueled by hungry tourists paying loads of money to occupy their frazzled minds. I am baffled that people can watch these “sideshow acts” without questioning how these Elephants are actually doing these things. It is clear that they were never meant to be domesticated in this way. Clearly elephants weren’t made to paint pictures, sit like dogs, be ridden, or confined in an environment clearly unsuitable for their large body structures. But, instead of responding to nature…these “Elephant Trainers” use sharp iron rods to show authority and intimidate them, out of their own strength, from the minute they are born. How else are humans expected to challenge such intensely powerful creatures without a little blood being shed? Perhaps we should take the bonnets off their heads, people off their backs, chains off their necks… and get them back to the place they were meant to be…nature.

Please don’t spend your money supporting this rampant exploitation.

My suggestion is volunteering at the Elephant Nature Park- (http://www.elephantnaturepark.org/) a Rescue and rehabilitation center for Elephants in Chiang Mai, Thailand- devoted to healing these magnificent creatures. It’s time to stop being paying witnesses of animal abuse and start being a part of positive, progressive, mental adjustment….

Fish Spas.

Yea… so… wanna know how they get these little tiny fish to eat all of the dead skin off your feet? They starve them to near death. Worth the price? While living in Pai I saw what happened when a local Fish Spa owner decided to take a weekend vacation. I guess she assumed that starving them a little longer than usual wouldn’t be of harm. But, upon her return, every single one of her fish was dead. She went out of business that week. This is an extreme case of negligence, not to mention bad business, but it gives one an idea of the sort of people willing to run these “fish spas”. You can’t really walk 2 blocks in Thailand without passing about a dozen of these places…  The clear crisis is the sad mistreatment of these fish.

My suggestion… GET A LOOFAH DUDE!

On the topic of Stray Dogs…

If anyone reading this post has any connection to an animal rights organization that does work in South East Asia… could you please forward this message along: THE DOGS IN THAILAND NEED HELP! They need to be fixed, to prevent future generations from suffering the immensely sad life of a dog born in Thailand. I can’t say that the notion of eating them is any worse than how I saw them being treated alive. Thousands upon thousands of: mangy, disfigured, diseased, dogs wander the streets. They are deprived beyond comprehension. Because most of the locals are barely able to support themselves, large liters of puppies are dropped off at nearby Temples. In 2 months of living at the Wat I saw about 20 abandoned dogs enter the scene. Tragically, when the temple (or community) does not have means to feed them… they are poisoned in the night. Problem sadly solved. If there is one thing that can be done… it is to reduce the amount of puppies that are being born.

My suggestion… start Supporting Animal Rights Organizations Abroad who are doing really important work.  And, at home… if your dog isn’t fixed… do it!  If you are looking to get an animal, rescue one! There is absolutely no need outside of ignorance to spend a significant amount of money (to purchase a genetically modified tea cup sized dog) when there are thousands of strays in search of a home.


If we are not better learning to honor the world around us how can we possibly learn to love and honor ourselves?


and Chickens…

so many chickens! All over the place! Born to wait…they are tied to each other by the ankles, left in the pouring rain, huddled in a small corner, just waiting to not exist.

My suggestion…  A gradual reduction of meat intake shows positive physical and environmental affects.


Paying Attention to Nature:

My current migration back to Bali brought me to Kuta Beach, which gave me a near panic attack when I saw its state of disaster…

This tourist “hot spot” has been ransacked by traveling party-goers who neglect the dirty beaches and murky waters — which are filled with  remnants of their “good times”. This beautiful place has been littered and cluttered to oblivion. I found myself (yet again) overwhelmed and fired up. So, I decided to do trash cleanup the next morning. I was welcomed and thanked by locals who are inevitably left to pick up garbage. As I helped them cleanup after visitors– on the land they live and work on- I was so embarrassed to be a foreigner. I wondered why there were not more travelers willing to grab some bags, and hit the beach… when it was undeniably clear it needed help! So much stinking trash and so many people willing to avoid looking at it… or picking it up.

Being a conscientious human is really not that hard. I was filling up bags of trash at the same time I was getting a tan and working my abs!   My suggestion is… We take as much initiative to have fun in life as we do in recognizing what is lost at the expense of our fun.

Grab a bag and pick up a piece of trash…I promise… it feels so good.


We’ve become mere spectators. We are blindly denying the collective devastation all around us and choosing not to do a single thing about it.

Rant Continued: Back to the Pigs and while I’m at it…On the Topic of Humans:

IT IS ALL ABOUT THE PIGS! No-thing is more sacred than the other. WE are all one. We have moved very far away from our natural compassionate state. And it is mind numbing.  It is etched on the stoned faces of millions of kids being raised by the TV instead of being handed an instrument to play and being “diagnosed” for being curious. Zombie- teenagers,- dehumanized, via prescription drugs with a notion that life has to be depressing. Adults are confined to the regimented chore of being everything the world thinks they “should be” rather than expressing what they “want” to be. And because of this expectation- we seek life partners to function as our “sources” of happiness rather than to support inner fulfillment.

Happy people are scary.


They threaten the norm—– tradition, religion, organization and power. Most importantly, wide-range happiness would instigate a dissolution of an imbalanced power structure that continues to dominate our world. We have officially been lost and the only place to run from here is deep inside. And, while it is dark and hard… the truth is there. And when we come out of the other side we will be better equipped to manage a living with more love and kindness. Or at least that’s the hope.

As a child, no teacher dare say “Do what you love, find a smile in every single day, and try to be the best damn person you can be”

They said “Pass these tests” and then when I got out of school, the world said “Make Lots of Money”. Well Screw your tests and your money! My family never had a lot of money  and it actually served us well. We didn’t have the means to use THINGS as a replacement for connection, love, or self expression. We were  full… full of Love.


As I cling to like-minded people, rationalizing where decency went, I feel like nothing on earth is changing. The manipulative energy  of power and greed continue to Trump our Hearts. I am met by the spirit of lonely people traveling the world in hopes of finding where our compassion, kindness, and humility went… do you feel it anymore? Not so much. But, it could be Everywhere! Let the rest of the world fight over who’s pile of shit is bigger- incarcerating or bombing innocent people, accusing truth speakers of treason, steeling oil, battling over color, forgetting the poor, neglecting the children, starving the hungry and walking by the homeless… but, choose not to be a part of it. The most we can hope to do is continue to LOVE the hell out of life and each other. That is the only option I see fit at this time.

Avoid becoming a part of the mess. Acknowledge the pigs, love the insects, find happiness in your small existence, let others know they mean something and are worth it—- and make your life worth it, too!  The pigs matter. We all matter. And this race- if it could ever get its heads out of its ass- matters. IT All MATTERS! But, in order to fully realize the magnitude of everything, of all, we must be willing to lose it all. We must disassemble our personal dependency on the external to make way for a healthier internal structure. And then, and only then, will we understand the magnitude of it all. Then…we can realize how profound we could be, should we choose to accept.

Stop killing and Start Living
Stop judging and Start Loving.
Open the Mind- Release the Heart.
Free yourself from being a sheep before you become the Pig.

“Oh there goes Gina on her rant about the “animal thingy”—”

Yea, the Animal “thingy” is MY “thingy” which is also YOUR “thingy”

we reap what we sow,
always have,
always will.


One thought on “A Time and A Place for the F word”

  1. Gina~ Your post resounded with me in ways you cannot imagine. It is because of my moral and ethical beliefs regarding the horrific treatment of animals around the world, including our own backyard so to speak, right smack dab in the good, ol’ US of that I became a vegetarian nearly 22 years ago. As difficult as it is to witness these atrocities and ” crimes against God’s four legged ( and some two legged ) creatures”, it behooves us all to look, absorb, and see, really see what truly goes on here. I commend you for chronicling what you’ve seen and writing about it with the sensitivity and compassion that it deserves. You are giving a voice to the animals who cannot speak and if they could thank you, I know that they would. ♥.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s